Wednesday, October 19, 2011

05. That Bitch*


She was pregnant again and we knew that the first 3 months are going to be the toughest. But I was ready. I learned new lingos like LMP and trimesters, I learned to count weeks instead of months, and I made sure I attend all the doctor appointments with her and even saved appointment reminders in my phone. I thought I was well prepared until she asked me a simple question, ‘Do I look fat?’ 

No matter how much you try, you are never prepared enough for the first trimester. Had I said, “You are pregnant, you are supposed to look fat. Don’t worry, this too shall pass”, all she would have heard was “you are supposed to look fat”. You are doomed for the night. Instead I said, “No honey, you still look sexy”. She was not happy either as she knew she was getting fat.

The hormones are playing haywire with her emotions, at the same time she is changing physically into something she thinks is unattractive. Every woman reacts to it in a different way. The symptoms of pregnancy like morning sickness, carvings, fatigue, and frequent urination are adding to the woes. At the same time she is worried about the life that is growing inside her. In fact she might not even enjoy sex at this stage.  After all it is she who is going through all this and not you, she deserves to be a bitch*. As a husband it is time for you to be responsible, responsible even for all the mistakes she had committed. Yes, take the blame. Remember 'i love you' and 'sorry', forget 'ego', it will make everything easy.

We discussed about the mood swings and all the symptoms of first trimester beforehand. Yes, there were times when she cried, times when she talked a lot, times when she was very happy, times when she was very worried, but she still she managed to be sane through those first three months. A bit of knowledge and understanding always helps. 

We saw Hridhima in USG for the first time (her pic below on 4th March, 2011). She looked like nothing recognizable, but still we were so happy to see her. She was growing perfectly. Around the 8th week we heard her heartbeat for the first time...that was recognizable.  What we felt at that moment is inexpressible. It was the beginning of an incredible journey.



* Dogs are wonderful creatures...We are all equals...if you think 'bitch' is an abuse then you are abusing one of natures sweetest creations...FYI

42 comments:

  1. You said it: now every man is gonna hear it from their women: " bacause SUB said so..." ;)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Owh.it seems that pregnancy is so hard :|
    I like the way you handle all the changes in her :D
    So,little angel's name is Hridhima,sounds nice..may i noe the meaning of her name?

    ReplyDelete
  3. am listening :)

    carry on...

    ReplyDelete
  4. Hmmm...I'm thinking, thinking and thinking...:) Waiting for the next post and yes, picture is such a treasure...:)

    ReplyDelete
  5. Oh yeah.. Have heard of mood swings during pregnancy...But my knowledge is limited and was derived from F.R.I.R.E.N.D.S (Phoebe buffay).

    Again, something new I learned here. Am liking this blog a lot SUB... Waiting for the next post :)

    ReplyDelete
  6. loved the post and you noble intentions, but if i were u, i would stay away from the B*** word during pregnancy-far, far away. nice new blog btw but please dont abandon khoj.

    ReplyDelete
  7. i so feel ur post right now ,gr8 blog bdw come thru my fashion blog n lets folloW Each other like twitter .

    C h u c h u - c h u l a l a . b l o g s p o t . c om

    ReplyDelete
  8. @Ege: LOL...i'm through...save the others :)

    ReplyDelete
  9. @the other side of me: Oh! these are wonderful moments to cherish :)
    Hridhaya is heart. ma is loving....so it's like a loving heart.... :)

    ReplyDelete
  10. @Saru Singhal: :D...it is...thanks soo much :)

    ReplyDelete
  11. @Anand: u sure u r not planning ;P ? lol
    thanks a lot :)

    ReplyDelete
  12. @confusedyuppie: I stayed away...faaaaar faaaar awaaaay...:)
    but we are god lovers...:]
    Don't worry...Khoj will be alive...:)

    ReplyDelete
  13. The deepnes of thoughts can still be met in ur these posts as well.

    Nice to go through ur experiences while learning about several things at the same time.

    ReplyDelete
  14. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  15. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Hello.
    I so enjoyed reading all of your entries.
    By being as involved as you have been, it has brought you and your wife even closer.
    Now the little one is here, you will definitely have your hands full, especially the teenage years (I know that's a long way off, but it'll be here before you know it). You have built a solid foundation on which to grow. You just have to stay committed.
    Once completed, your stories here will be a perfect gift to give to the little one when she's old enough & ready to start her own family.

    Well done, my friend & I like the photo of the three of you!

    Thanks for visiting. Much appreciated.

    Thoughts Of Beauty In The Stillness Of Dawn

    ReplyDelete
  17. With my first one my emotions were pretty good!!! I just got dizzy. No morning sickness!!! :)

    With my second one I was a blubbery mess!!! There was a shooting in a shopping mall here in town. 9 people were randomly shot. One I had a connection to. My sister was good friends with her daughter. I could not stop crying!!!

    It's good you took care of your wife!!!

    ReplyDelete
  18. @Andy: thanks a lot for dropping by....
    yes, that's the plan... :)
    thanks soo much..

    Glad you liked it :)

    ReplyDelete
  19. @alissa4illustration: Oh! that must have been shocking...
    thanks soo much for you comment :)

    ReplyDelete
  20. @Maitreyee Bhattacharjee Chowdhury: glad you dropped by...thanks soo much :)

    ReplyDelete
  21. Awww...its a delight reading u all over again Sub!! just that u've got a new role to carry now:)

    ReplyDelete
  22. @Aakriti: ...and i am loving this new role...that's the beauty of life...your roles keeps changing, and you are never stagnant :)

    ReplyDelete
  23. wow..step by step guide for wanna be parents from the coolest dad ever-kudos n *respect*:-)

    ReplyDelete
  24. @Suruchi: Coolest dad! hope Hridhima reads that one day :p
    thanks soo much :)

    ReplyDelete
  25. Beautiful narration! And the picture is superb! :)

    ReplyDelete
  26. Well, I would say people around you ( your wife, Hridhima and anyone) are so lucky :) You seem to be very responsible and caring :)
    Say my Hi to little Angel !!

    ReplyDelete
  27. so beautifully stated, and i think its really nice to hear an understanding viewpoint than a "oh my god wats wrong with her" pov ... and btw the bitch clarification thumbs up :) ... <3 this post

    ReplyDelete
  28. @Kalyani Gupta: thanks so much :))
    Hridhima says Hi!

    ReplyDelete
  29. @Menachery: Thanks again...glad u loved it :)

    ReplyDelete
  30. Hridima, a different name, yet has a beautiful ring to it. What does it mean? Nice post, very well written, wasn't bored one bit :) :D


    If you could spare a few minutes, could you read a post of mine? And maybe leave feedback and vote too, if you like it? It'd go a long long way in helping me out with a competition on indiblogger, and I'd be really really thankful :)

    http://www.indiblogger.in/indipost.php?post=90039

    ReplyDelete
  31. @Achyuth: thanks so much...it comes from Hriday :)

    ReplyDelete
  32. Still some double meaning hides in your blog

    ReplyDelete
  33. @sedated: really? and i thought this was plain:)

    ReplyDelete